I know, right? It sounds like a lot of fun! Well, let me tell you... it IS a lot of fun! That is... until you realize that someone has to pay for this new car... and that someone is going to be you (me). When you realize that you will be parting with your own hard earned money to support this new financial burden, it becomes a lot less fun and a lot more... well... let's just say annoying.
Needless to say, I have been cruising the interwebz in search of the perfect vehicle. The vehicle that will unite me with the road I travel on! A car that really *GETS* me, you know? No, actually... all that is bullshit. I want an SUV and I want it to be reasonably priced and to get good(ish) gas mileage. I just want a fuckin' car. So Mark and I have been browsing autotrader, yahoo auto, carmax... all the fun sites... looking for one and I stumbled across a particularly interesting vehicle. We'll come back to that in a second.
Now for the record, I would just like to point out that I am a terrible artist. That's actually a lie. If I am looking at a picture, I can copy it onto a piece of paper, no problem. I also have an uncanny ability to draw maps. Freehand though, that's my weakness. I have never played Pictionary, but I can almost gaurentee it would go something like this:
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Clue: Your word is TREE
Me: *draws a tree*
Teammate 1: Is it a...
Teammate 2: WTF is that?
Teammate 3: Is it a boat?
Teammate 2: No....
Teammate 3: A spider? A baseball bat??
Me: *crazy eyes*
Teammate 1: Abraham Lincoln! A penny?!?!?
Me: *shakes head, points to the tree*
Teammate 2: The White House?
Teammate 1: Brazil?
Teammate 2: A basketball? A monkey? A swimming pool??
*Time's up!*
Me: It's a TREE you fucking idiots! See! The trunk? The branches? The leaves??? I even used the green marker!
Teammate 1: I'm still pretty sure that's Abraham Lincoln.
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Naturally, I am terrible at drawing cars. In fact, here is my artists representation of a car. Any car, really.
So when I stumbled across the Inifiniti FX, it really took my breath away. Not because I found it to be particularly amazing... or because I thought it might be "the one"... but because it looks like this:
Now... maybe we should talk about where Infiniti came up with this concept design and why I am not getting my fair share of the benefits? The first words out of my mouth were "Look at the hood! That looks like how I draw cars! Why is it so long??" And really... why IS it so long? How big is the engine in this thing? Chillax Infiniti, this isn't the Indy 500. I just need something to get me to and from doctors appointments.Bottom Line: I'm not getting an Infiniti. I wish I could say that it was because of the hood, but really... it's because I have slightly better things to do with $50,000. Like buy candy.
ACCUSATION: Copying my drawing of a car and making it into a real car.
VERDICT: Guilty of ugliness and long hoodedness.
"...I can almost gaurentee..."
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